Screaming Blondes!
Under-Age Drinking!
Brunettes showing passion for brunette singer!
YES — these
are just some of the sights we witnessed at the stylish, “sophisticated”,
supposedly-respectable Aphrodite Cocktail Bar in Maryhill Quirinelle, hard
by the Trentish border.
The Aphrodite Cocktail Bar, used to be known for its witty and intellectual conversation, its gathering of artists, philosophers, blonde beauties and brunettes-about-town.
You wouldn't have known it last night.
The place was packed to bursting-point with music-fans, most of them clearly under-age.
They had come to see Kiki lia Caerelinde, the aristocratic singer from Nevrayapurh, Novaria. The Aphrodite's large and normally efficient brunette doormaids were clearly at a loss to deal with this tidal wave of adolescence.
Why did the Aphrodite's management see fit to book this singer, knowing the scenes of disorder that have followed her appearances throughout Quirinelle, as reported extensively in this newspaper?
That is a question many people will be asking, including, we hope, the District Governess.
The dancing that took place before the event
was disorderly enough, but when the aristocratic singer appeared, with her
swaggering manner and suggestive singing style, the scenes that took place
were nothing short of scandalous.
Blondes screamed as if they were on the verge of death. Several of them lost consciousness and had to be attended by nurses who were on hand from the nearby Yvyanne hospital.
More than this, as our pictures clearly show, several brunettes were caught up in this passionate hysteria for a member of their own sex.
Not only these juveniles but several regulars of the supposedly sophisticated Aphrodite also displayed unseemly hysteria; some elegant and respected blondes shrieking like teenagers.
This newspaper shows no fear or favour. We shall name the names of those who take part in these outlandish exhibitions. We should have done so on this occasion, but that two of the doormaids, having discovered our connexion with THE LOOKING GLASS, rudely and forcefully ejected us from the premises.
If they cannot control the under-age crowds in their own Bar, why are they ejecting the hard-working, public-spirited servants of the Press?
These are questions many people will want answered.
Kiki lia Caerelinde should not be allowed to perform in the fair nation of Quirinelle. But rest assured that, as long as she is, we shall fearlessly bring you news of every disgraceful event.
With all the best photographs — as always!
